The definition of Imposter Syndrome is: a collection of feelings of inadequacy that persist despite evident success.
According to the man himself:
"the exaggerated esteem in which my lifework is held makes me very ill at ease. I feel compelled to think of myself as an involuntary swindler.” Albert Einstein
How does someone with all of his achievements have Imposter Syndrome?! He isn't the only majorly successful person to of admitted to having this feeling:
“I have written eleven books, but each time I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody and they’re going to find me out.” Maya Angelou
Doing a quick Google search will show you there are tons more successful people that also have this self doubt.
Do you have it? I definitely have it. I wouldn't class myself as being particularly successful but I still find myself in situations where I feel I don't belong.
I spent almost my whole career working in Retail, I studied accounting and finance but never properly applied what I had learnt about in books. At the age of 31 I applied for a Finance Manager role, not really believing I would get it. When the recruiting manager sat me down and told me she wanted to offer me the position, the first words out of my mouth were: "Are you sure?!"
I sit in meetings still today and a voice enters my head "You don't belong here. Any minute they are going to ask you to leave this call because you shouldn't of been invited and you have nothing to add". I look at the other people in the meeting and they don't look anything like me, they don't speak like me and I am pretty sure they are far more educated than I am.
I used to think I was the only one that felt like this until I came across the term Imposter Syndrome and started to look in to it. It turns out nearly everyone has experienced it at some point in their lives to varying degrees. That made me feel a little better. However when I found out that there were really successful people that had it, I couldn't believe it. I will never get anywhere near their achievements so if they still feel it, what hope do I have?!
I have good news. Imposter Syndrome can be treated. I'm still looking for a cure but until then I am going to try the treatment.
It is always worth noting that what works for one person may not work for another so what I always do with things like this is to try different techniques and see which one works for me.
These are the things I am going to try:
Answer my feelings back with fact
Feelings are not fact.
It is important that I acknowledge my feelings but I then look at the facts. If there is a voice in my head telling me I feel like I don't belong here and I feel like everyone in this meeting is so different to me, I could answer back in fact: I am in this meeting because whoever set this meeting up feels I should be here. I may be different to all of these other people and that will probably mean I will have a different perspective on the topic we are discussing.
Just by doing this I have made myself feel more at ease. This will take practice and those feelings will resurface, but if I keep looking for the facts then majority of the time it will put my mind at ease.
Use it as my superpower
Early on in my retail career I was covering for the supervisor for a good few months. Everyone treated me as if I was already the supervisor even though my job title hadn't changed. I then got the opportunity to interview for the role. I sat down in the interview, leaning back on the chair thinking to myself, why are they even interviewing me? They know I can do the job. They are just doing this as a formality. So I gave short answers, weren't really thinking about what I was saying and I had done no prep before hand.
Safe to say I didnt get the job. It hurt, but I know now that it was the right decision and I didn't deserve to get it. What is ironic is that it was one of the few times I haven't felt like an imposter but it worked out in a negative way.
Which led me to think, what if I had felt like an Imposter? I would of prepped for the interview and I would of been super nervous and would of been so attentive throughout the interview. Therefore Imposter Syndrome can be a good thing if used in the right way.
So I'll use it to my advantage. Before presenting to a group of people I will undoubtably feel like an imposter so I will practice what I want to say and plan it all out and make sure I am, 100% prepared. Just before the presentation I start feeling my heart beat fast, I start thinking I am going to screw it up, no one is going to be interested in what I am saying, etc.
Instead of letting those negative thoughts take over I tell myself it is normal to feel like this, majority of people would feel nervous in this situation. It is a good thing I am feeling like this because it is going to ensure my adrenaline is pumping and it will help me bring more energy in to what I am saying. It will help me to focus more. I have done the prep, now I just need to give it all I have.
Be Compassionate to myself
This is probably the hardest thing to do. Being kind to yourself. One of the things I read about in the book Ten Times Happier is you should never say something to yourself that you wouldn't say to someone you care about.
For example, if your friend came to you and told you they were nervous about starting a new job and felt like they didn't deserve it. You would prbably say to them: "You have nothing to worry about, you are amazing at what you do and you got the job on merit so just show them what you can do". Great advice but would you ever say that to yourself if you had the same feeling? Why not?
Every one has a negative voice in their head that pops up every now and again so i am going to try battle the negative voice with a positive one and see if that helps.
These are just some examples of what I am trying and I reckon there are so many other techniques out there. If you have ones that works for you then please share it with me! I'll keep searching for that cure and in fact I have found a book with that very title: The Imposter Cure. I'm not sure if it will cure me yet as I'm only half way through but I am enjoying learning more about this very interesting topic.
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Thanks for reading,
Gav
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